Reply to Thread

talking about past sexuality confusion with partner.. do I need to?

Hi Folks

I'm a guy in a happy long term relationship (10years) with a great woman. When I was younger (teens and early twenties) I was confused over my sexuality. I always enjoyed doing stuff with girls but I also questioned whether I was also attracted to guys and if I was bi.

I have never experimented with guys and never really had the urge to do this. It was always more of a fantasy. So my problem is...

When my GF and I got together ( more than 10 years ago) I was coming to the end of my confusion. As part of my curiousity I logged onto adult chatrooms and had dirty talk with people ( both sexes). It was a laugh but I never really had the urge to do it again. At this point my GF and I had been seeing each other for a few months. Our relationship wasn't serious and I don't think either of us were thinking long term at that point.

We soon became serious and from that point onwards ( 10 years ago) I have never used chatrooms, cheated or even considered being with anyone else. I did confess to some of the chatroom stuff 10 years ago but didn't mention gender. She really didn't want to talk about it.

I am feeling guilty about it again - 10 years later!! I tried to bring it up last week to get it off mychest and she got angry and told me it was 10 years ago and to forget it and that she didn't want to know.

I guess I kinda feel like I should tell her that I used to be confused about who I was but at the same time I don't want to worry or scare her. I love her verymuch and could not imagine being with anyone else, male or female. We have a good life, sex life, etc etc. I do not identify myself as bisexual.

So, in summary, do I try to discuss the chatroom stuff with her again or just let it lie as it was so long ago AND do i need to tell her about my past confusion over my sexuality? Again, I have been 100% faithful and have no intention of going elsewhere.

Any advice would be welcomed

Thanks folks.