I need a daily boost of spiritual positivity, because my head is always in my hands.?

Life is a compromise, I know this, I know it well. The thing is I can't seem to find that inner strength, that punctuates my ability to see the forest through the trees. Being a creative person magnifies an intense longing for things to be solvent. I hate praying, because I pray for the same things, it's not that I don't believe in God, but sometimes I look around at all these people in the world, in my neighborhood, in the city, what possible attention would I receive from a God so busy?
I believe miracles happened in the world because there were less people in it. Now it seems like I'm living in an overcrowded bubble, of desperate, sometimes manic distraction, and chaos. I feel lost, afraid and distant from my own real self.