I tried asking this once tonight, but forgot to explain that the theme of the essay is "How Religion Affected the Ancient Egyptians."
My daughter is in 6th grade, and so far she's only done ONE five-paragraph essay. She's very new at this. She's asked teachers to help, but the language teacher told her to go back to the history teacher, and the history teacher just told her to go home and work on it this weekend.
When I looked at her paper, though, I honestly couldn't figure out HOW to set this up. She isn't allow a text book (they can't "afford" to send books home, because they can't afford to lose any), so I can't look over the work and tell anything. I can tell from her efforts that she knows some things, but I don't see three, complete thoughts. Can you help me try to sort out three main ideas?
What I see is:
1) Egyptians were polytheists, who believed that cats were goddesses. (Nothing here talks about how this belief affected their lives.) and
(2) They believed in mummifying, but I don't see where she talks about how this related to religion or their lives. (What can she add to this?)
(3) Like I said, I don't see a third point. Here's what she wrote:
(4) I think she has a start for summing up (conclusion), because she tells her opinion.
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Religion was very important to the ancient Egyptians. First, Egyptians had gods and goddesses. They are polytheistic. They believed that cats were goddesses and they'd protect them. Religion was very important to them. The mummies are another part of their religion. Mummies have to be prepared for the afterlife. Osiris and Anubis prepared the bodyes for the afterlife. Egyptians believed that the god Ra and other gods like Amon-Ra created and ruled the world. These are some of the gods, Horus, athor, Ra, Anubis, Osiris, Amon-Ra. There is a process called embalming for mummies. I think their religion is cool, but I stick with my own.
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PLEASE help here, please? Even if you were the one who originally responded, since I've re-explained this, please take into consideration what I've explained here and give me your advice. Thanks!