Thread: Taper from oxycodone - round 3

Hey Reach,

Yeah, I know I'm not taking the "slow road" on the taper. The thing is, I guess I really don't care if I level off before making the next cut. As long as the symptoms aren't too horrendous, I want to keep going and feeling a sense of progress and hope. I don't want to get "used to" a certain dose, start feeling better, then go through it all over again....know what I mean? I really don't think I WILL be able to feel better while I'm tapering. My body is so stiff....it's been artificially propped up by the Oxy for so long. This last 15 mg seems so small (compared to my usual 60-75 mg), yet so large.....quite an accomplishment in two weeks (pats self on back), light at the end of the tunnel....yet it's still so far away. I just want my life back....right now, it's like I'm in a state of lirabo -- still taking the Oxy, but not getting that feeling of "normal", much less "energetic".

Well, just babbling now....I'm up really late watching CNN on the Michael Jackson coverage....so sad, he was such a cute kid. But gotta go to bed before my last dose wears off....as always, thanks and hugs.

Well, I think I'm now at approx 19 mg. This has always been my breaking point in past tapers....and I can see why. My body is stiff as a board. The pain is bad, but not a whole lot worse than usual. It's just the stiffness, occasional hot flashes and clamminess, and general weird feeling. I don't know how I'm going to gear myself up for the event I have to go to on Sun. I don't know how I'm going to find the energy to get all dressed up, do the hair and make-up. Most days lately, I look like a pitiful wreck....and this is coming from someone who was really into my looks, clothes, accessories, shoes. My skin feels so creepy-crawly. I'm sweating a lot of the time....yuck. The event starts 90 mins. before my afternoon dose. Can't you just see me in my get-up all antsy and sweaty? In past tapers, if I had an event to go to, I'd always bring more than my taper dose -- just in case. God forbid I'd get sick during the event....how would I explain that? And then, of course, I'd wind up taking the extra pills and blowing the taper. I do NOT want to do that this Sun.

I wanted to go for a swim today....the sun was finally out after being MIA for pretty much the whole month. Thought it would help with the stiffness. I couldn't do it. Too much energy to go to the pool. The water would be freezing. I'd be freezing when I got out. I'd probably do less than one lap and be a mess. I feel too weird. I did manage to do a few erranRAB and walk the dog around the building. Poor dog....neeRAB more exercise than I can give him. I still haven't gotten around to doing my bills. Things are so overwhelming....even just routine things. Cleaning? Lord knows when/if that'll ever get done. I'm lucky I unload the dishwasher once in awhile and put the dirty stuff in.

Well, the laptop hurts my leg, so I'll sign off now....please keep me in your thoughts....it's getting to crunch time.

You tapering and me off of the Oxy caused the decline!! LOL!!

As I said before, once I came off the Oxy, everything hurt and still does. That's because they are real injuries or real arthritis, that normally hurts and NOW I can feel it. When it hits me bad, I take Advil and it will reduce it down to acceptable pain levels. Nobody said that we would be pain-free. I hurt because of old age and things I did when I was younger that stressed my body. It's normal pain that people my age have and live with. So, I accept it and live with it.

YES, it is now time to DO IT!!!!!!! Make sure you flush the rest of the pills after taking that last dose. If you dont' think that you can do it, then have someone else flush them for you. I am very amazed that you have been able to follow the strict taper, especially to something that you were addicted to. That is truly amazing and you are very strong minded and courageous. Keep it up, flush, and don't look back.

brian
p.s. You can always take something OTC like Tylenol, Advil, Aleve, or just plain old Bayer aspirin and see how that works on the pain, you might be wonderfully surprised.

Hi Brian, coincidentally enough, I am on a prescription anti-inflammatory already....HOWEVER, I went off it a week or so ago, because my stomach was such a mess. I didn't know whether it was the anti-inflamm, or the reduction in oxycodone, so I decided to stop the anti-inflamm too. Well, I do think that's one of the reasons I was aching so much -- actually, my arthritic hanRAB even hurt (and they never hurt before). So I got myself on Prilosec and re-started the anti-inflamm yesterday. I feel much better today. At least I can get out of the chair without a major ordeal. Or maybe it's because my body's leveled off at 2 mg of Oxy. I dunno....so darn confusing. But I don't think it was a good idea to stop anti-inflamm AND Oxy at the same time. Soooo, while I'm feeling a tad better, I'm going to try to get dressed (hair/make-up), go out tonight, do some erranRAB too, and then start tapering down again.

I do take a huge-a** multi-vitamin and two calcium pills daily. I hate taking pills....well now, that just sounded ridiculous, didn't it.

Redrock, thank you so much for your message. It means so much to have others who understand and can relate to my suffering. A few weeks ago, honestly, I was at the depths of depression, and my thoughts were not good ones (if you know what I mean). Who wants to live like this for another 15, 20, 25 years.... OK, but at least I'm over that! I feel a hope now....like, wow, wouldn't it be great to not have these hot flashes/sweats/chills....wouldn't it be great to travel to (anywhere) and not have to count pills....hey, maybe I could even move to (insert state) like I've wanted to do....maybe I'd be happy again, not so snippy, able to go out with frienRAB, enjoy my family despite their quirks....blah blah, you know, just fantasizing about a pill-free life.

But you're right -- we can't get ahead of ourselves. That's why I'm not projecting my taper timeline beyond a day or two at a time. Anyway, my pain is bad but I believe my body is so used to the narcotic, the pain level is aggravated until it gets used to not having it. So I'm not freaking out about it. This is a huge challenge and my desire to see it through is incredibly strong. Well, the good news is -- since I've been blathering on, I managed to go an extra half-hour without my dose! And I didn't even notice. Sort of shows me that a lot of this is psychological....with no other distractions, I sit there and watch the clock....start to sweat, then get chills, etc.

OK, well, thanks again for the support and I will check in again tomorrow....have a good night (and I do love Red Rock Country!).

3) 21mgs to 15mg in one week is pretty steep at this point. That is a 30% cut nearly! Baby steps, NP, baby steps!

Reach is right.... It sounRAB like you are tapering way too quickly. SLOW down and take baby steps!! You are in my thoughts....

Very very down today.....can't stop crying.....very despondent....don't know why I'm suddenly so down.....I do have some family problems but nothing drastic has happened....I'm incapacitated again....but still at same dose as last few days. I pray I can get through this.

Hey there NotPerky - I'm trying to catch up after being away for a while - this last part, going from 5 mg/day down to 2.5 mg/day was the worst for me and I had withdrawals the whole time. Finally going cold turkey at 2.5 mg/day wasn't as bad though. But I was doing things wrong and not properly splitting up my doses equally throughout the day like you are doing. That makes it easier on the body to handle the lower dose. Keep plodding along and keep that final goal in view. Now that I'm over it I can look back and see how miserable I was and how good and alive I feel now. It was a struggle and it was worth it to finally severe the oxy cord and become free.

Trust me... every little ache an pain in your body will be amplified when you get down to the lower levels and once your finally get off. All of the pain centers that were being blocked by the Oxy start transmitting the pain to your brain again. I still ache (6 month post-Oxy), but these are normal injuries and pain that I have in my body and I am able to live with the inconvenience of not doing the things that I used to do because I have pain. Just in comparison though, the pain I feel now is 1/100th of the pain I felt during withdrawals.

In the end you will look back and see how much better you feel once you are off of the Oxy and can experience life normally. It is so much worth it!!

Notperky don't beat yourself up! You are human and frankly, doing the best you can. I wonder how it must be to be in constant pain and addicted to what helps you. I understand the merry go round. I am like you when you take the pills with you, contantly figuring out how many you'll need, etc. I started to take them myself because of an injury and like so many others, I continued to take them after I have healed. I never anticipated how my spirits would "lift" when I was on them. But now, like you, I take them to just feel "normal." It sucks. Honestly now i notice that I'm just a moody Bi*ch regardless. I am on Anti-Depressants (Zoloft 100mg) And they used to help a lot better on lower doses of Opiates. Is there anyone you can trust that you can give your pills to and have them dole them out to you when its time? I was wondering if I should do that as well. I simply can not trust myself to be disciplined enough to taper correctly. Sometimes it helps to have a trusted individual help you on your journey to recovery. And I would also be honest with your PM dr. I know it is easy to give advice and not take it yourself so I feel like a hyprocrite. But deep down, we ALL know what the right thing is to do. Its hard and it is a struggle....sometimes minute by minute. I often wonder how I got to this point. Addiction is cunning and sneaks up on you. Before you know it, years go by. I'm still a bit baffled myself. Good luck on what you decide to do. And take it day by day, second by second if you need to. We are all here in support.