Thread: Is my daughter behind?

A friend of mine has a almost four year old boy. My daughter is a month older then he is. Her son goes to a special education preschool. They told her that something is wrong with him because he can't cut a perfect line with scissors, stay in the lines when he colors, recognize his abc and numbers and know all of his shapes and how many sides they have. Also they said he should be able to write his name. My daughter does not know any of this stuff either. I try teaching it to her but she will not sit long enough to learn anything. I still though think that she is a very smart little girl. She can put any puzzle giving to her together and is great at matching colors and shapes. Is she though behind for her age?I think that they have to stop putting so much pressure on children schools expect to much out of them and dont let them just be kids

Oh my I think parents really need to relax, they dont need to pressure their kids to be little genuises, let them be kids!!!That's what I think about it!You said it yourself, she's a smart little girl.Makes me mad when people pressure you to feel like your child isn't smart enough. Every adult is different, so is every child.All these children that have been put under pressure from schools and parents to be uber smart are going to have a hard time in life when they realize that this is not realistic.

Honestly, yes, your daughter is behind. I'm not going to sugarcoat and just tell you what you want to hear. Below, please find a list of what is expected of 4 year old children. You don't need to "sit and teach her." Teach her through play. When you do arts and crafts, instead of giving her a blank piece of paper to color, print out some letters for her to color.apples4theteacher.com has some great ones if you search around.Program Goal And Objectives for Ages 4-5.-Recognizes own name in print.-Recognizes simples words and/or letters of special interest.-Recognizes all letters of alphabet in random order.-Is introduced to lower case letters.-Can write first and last name.-Can count from 0 to 50.-Understands number concepts and different methods of counting.-Recognizes chemical changes in activities such as cooking and painting.-Begins to duplicate or copy patterns of beads, blocks, etc.-Can create patterns and sequences.-Understands measuring concepts with various measuring tools.-Follow 3 to 4 step directions-Increase attention span by requiring more time per activity.-Can concentrate on one task for up to 20 minutes.-Is comfortable in 20 - 30 minute group morning meeting.-Asserts self by asking questions and making comments.-Animates figures or dresses up and participates in role playing.-Shows an awareness of good and bad.-Teach new songs, poems and finger plays.-Demonstrates an understanding of good health and clean habits.-Adds personal ideas to a project already in progress.-Engages in role playing concerning real life situations.-Initiates others in play situations or in small group games.-Responds with pride when praised and can handle correction of inappropriate behavior.-Master self-help skills such as pouring milk, getting dressed, washing hands..-Demonstrates memory for past events or specific learning activities-Assumes responsibility for personal belongings and personal routines. Your child should be able to do all of the following before he turns 5. If she cannot, then she is behind. Focus on trying to teach your child these things in a laid back environment.

If your child has been exposed to these things and still cannot do them then I'd say yes, she is behind. However, if you (or anyone else) have not been working with her on these things then its time to start but she isn't behind. You're right, there is a LOT of pressure on schools and teachers. I teach preschool (4-5 year olds) for an ISD and it is very tough. I did my student teaching in Kindergarten and I do not remember doing half that stuff when I was in Kinder! However, like the previous poster said, these things can be taught in a fun way. If you make it stressful then they will resist and get stressed out! Each child is different. The students in my class all vary in how far they have come with each skill we've gone over. You can take her where she is right now and start working with her on various skills. If you try to help her with all of the guidelines the previous poster listed all at once you'll be overwhelmed and so will she. Relax, take a deep breath, and it'll be okay. Don't worry too much about it. Go find some learning books at Walmart or Target and see how she does with them. Give her a pair of scissors and paper with no lines and just let her cut. Let her play with play dough (this will strengthen her fine motor skills and she will be more able to hold scissors/pens/pencils/etc. correctly and control the instrument more). Point out colors when you see them and act excited about it. Again, each child has their own set of strengths and weaknesses.