o I've been dating my girlfriend for over a year now and we had sex around the 4th month. At the time it was fun and exciting but we only had sex a few times because it was so painful for her. She hadn't had sex before me nor did she wear tampons. This made for a very unpleasant first couple times. After a few times of trying she shut down sexually. She doesn't want to even try to have sex. We've resorted to our own type of sex where we just rub in a way. But this isn't what this is about. My problem is that she has little to no sex drive. I have a very high sex drive. When i try and engage intimacy she ignores and acts like an attempt to be sexual never happened. Many people say find a new girlfriend but i don't feel right doing that because i took her virginity and Ive been with her for so long... But at the same time i get depressed and feel unwanted. I know its very easy to think my partner is selfish when in reality i'm the selfish one, but I don't believe i am because im not saying im going to leave her or that im forcing her to have sex with me. I just want her to want to have sex with me, or atleast want to get me excited. All her friends talk about how they have sex and do all these fun activities with their boyfriends. I guess i just want that type of relationship. How can i start making my relationship more sexual and intimate?? The only thing she likes to do is shop and do her makeup!
So its not so much about the pain.... its the lack of even wanting to full around. Only because sex hurts doesnt mean oral sex hurts or other ways hurt. She isn't open to any communication. She acts like im the bad guy when i try and talk and she totally ignores anything i have to say. Also she gets pissed off when i do try and bring things up. SO basically there cant be any communication.. what can i do to open up communication. She has already told me sex just isnt something she wants or needs. is that the end of it?? Is there anything i can do??