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  1. #11
    Joe Blow's Avatar
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    Best to read grr martins game of thrones. He has so many warrior descriptions fighting styles personalities and battle dress that it'll be a good education all around.

  2. #12
    Dialogue is usually a pretty good tool for character description, and a lot depends on the POV of the story. Is it a narrative? If so you have a lot more wiggle room with this but also the pitfall of over describing. If it's a character's POV it's a lot easier, describe them through the characters eyes.

  3. #13
    MildChild's Avatar
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    Definitely break up your descriptions and put them in little by little. You don't want your reader to be overwhelmed or bored by a long description of each person, so introduce their physical characteristics in pieces. It's good that each fighter has his/her own style and weapon, that will help keep them individual for the reader. Tie in a bit of personality (such as reactions to others, facial expressions, etc.) periodically, but not every time the person has an action or line of dialog.

    Have you done background pieces with these characters? Mini-stories or scenes in which you explore the characters' histories, either with each other or alone. Don't plan to use these mini-stories in your main story; this will free you to explore things you wouldn't have otherwise thought of. (Look for books, magazines or websites with writing exercises.) This background work WILL affect how you present your characters in your main story, believe it or not.

    Try several different approaches -- then read them out loud, either to another person or into a recorder (yeah, I know, I hate the sound of my own voice too). Things seem to stand out differently when read out loud than when read on the page. Listen for rhythm, phrasing, out-of-character dialog. If you've done a lot of reading, you will be able to pick up on these things.

  4. #14
    MildChild's Avatar
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    Definitely break up your descriptions and put them in little by little. You don't want your reader to be overwhelmed or bored by a long description of each person, so introduce their physical characteristics in pieces. It's good that each fighter has his/her own style and weapon, that will help keep them individual for the reader. Tie in a bit of personality (such as reactions to others, facial expressions, etc.) periodically, but not every time the person has an action or line of dialog.

    Have you done background pieces with these characters? Mini-stories or scenes in which you explore the characters' histories, either with each other or alone. Don't plan to use these mini-stories in your main story; this will free you to explore things you wouldn't have otherwise thought of. (Look for books, magazines or websites with writing exercises.) This background work WILL affect how you present your characters in your main story, believe it or not.

    Try several different approaches -- then read them out loud, either to another person or into a recorder (yeah, I know, I hate the sound of my own voice too). Things seem to stand out differently when read out loud than when read on the page. Listen for rhythm, phrasing, out-of-character dialog. If you've done a lot of reading, you will be able to pick up on these things.

  5. #15
    M. W.'s Avatar
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    Say the name of the MC, and important characters. If there's a character that's only mentioned once and has nothing to do with the plot, don't give them a name.

    Don't care too much about their looks. People will picture in their head what they want to picture.

    _Show_ the characters' fighting skills when they're practicing or in battle.

    It's not a good idea for writers to just tell readers this and that. A writer doesn't write:

    His name was John, and he was one of the best martial artists and sword fighters. He had blue eyes that cut through you in battle, and long, wavy, blond hair. He was witty and serious and cocky and, if he knew too many of your secrets, dangerous.

    Literary agents abhor this. Seasoned readers abhor this. (Or most, anyway.)

    Think of descriptions as sprinkles you scatter across the page. Don't cluster them in one spot. Too much of a bite. Sprinkle them all over the place.

    Also, you just don't _tell_ the reader what kind of personality the character has. "Show" it.

    I suggest you learn the difference between "showing" and "telling." This is important to learn in the craft of writing!

    Also, the word 'alright' is misspelled. It's not one word. Two words. 'All right.'

    Good luck.

  6. #16
    Joe Blow's Avatar
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    Best to read grr martins game of thrones. He has so many warrior descriptions fighting styles personalities and battle dress that it'll be a good education all around.

  7. #17
    M. W.'s Avatar
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    Say the name of the MC, and important characters. If there's a character that's only mentioned once and has nothing to do with the plot, don't give them a name.

    Don't care too much about their looks. People will picture in their head what they want to picture.

    _Show_ the characters' fighting skills when they're practicing or in battle.

    It's not a good idea for writers to just tell readers this and that. A writer doesn't write:

    His name was John, and he was one of the best martial artists and sword fighters. He had blue eyes that cut through you in battle, and long, wavy, blond hair. He was witty and serious and cocky and, if he knew too many of your secrets, dangerous.

    Literary agents abhor this. Seasoned readers abhor this. (Or most, anyway.)

    Think of descriptions as sprinkles you scatter across the page. Don't cluster them in one spot. Too much of a bite. Sprinkle them all over the place.

    Also, you just don't _tell_ the reader what kind of personality the character has. "Show" it.

    I suggest you learn the difference between "showing" and "telling." This is important to learn in the craft of writing!

    Also, the word 'alright' is misspelled. It's not one word. Two words. 'All right.'

    Good luck.

  8. #18
    M. W.'s Avatar
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    Say the name of the MC, and important characters. If there's a character that's only mentioned once and has nothing to do with the plot, don't give them a name.

    Don't care too much about their looks. People will picture in their head what they want to picture.

    _Show_ the characters' fighting skills when they're practicing or in battle.

    It's not a good idea for writers to just tell readers this and that. A writer doesn't write:

    His name was John, and he was one of the best martial artists and sword fighters. He had blue eyes that cut through you in battle, and long, wavy, blond hair. He was witty and serious and cocky and, if he knew too many of your secrets, dangerous.

    Literary agents abhor this. Seasoned readers abhor this. (Or most, anyway.)

    Think of descriptions as sprinkles you scatter across the page. Don't cluster them in one spot. Too much of a bite. Sprinkle them all over the place.

    Also, you just don't _tell_ the reader what kind of personality the character has. "Show" it.

    I suggest you learn the difference between "showing" and "telling." This is important to learn in the craft of writing!

    Also, the word 'alright' is misspelled. It's not one word. Two words. 'All right.'

    Good luck.

 

 

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