making me suicidal? I am 24 years old and I weigh 138 lbs and I am wayy to fat. I feel huge, fat and nasty. And I eat, so I am not anorexic. I sure think about starving myself to death or carving off all my fat, but that's ok. I'd be willing to do it. I don't know what to do. I am dead serious. I feel like a beached whale. I'll even post a pic.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/28186512@N07/5851307118/

I just feel too fat and too discusting . I went to the ER last Tuesday for suicidal thoughts and all that, not weight related, and on Friday I have a follow up appointment with a doctor, just a doc that I've never met, and I'm thinking it's not worth going and it's about time I start the starvation process. I mean, no doc will take someone serious when they are losing their mind like me. I am fat and that's a fact. I seriously think I am willing to start starving myself to death. I don't know what to do