So this may be a bit of a long story. I'm really sorry but I really need your help, I think I might swoop back to depression again if I don't get some advice or something.. 5 points best answer!!

So when I was in high school, I was one of the popular girls. All of my friends, including my boyfriend are in the cheering squad, I wasn't, but being one of them made me popular too. I had some insecurities of course, being different from them, but being popular in school made it okay. I wasn't really a bully even tho I was popular.. some kids who are kind of lower than me may have been intimidated by me of course, but I never meant to intimidate anyone I guess. Also, I had a lot of suitors back then, even tho I have a boyfriend, guys would still be crushing on me.

That all changed when I was in my senior year. My boyfriend broke up with me. I was really down because he was like my backbone. I got really depressed. I lost a lot of friends, and of course I lost my popularity because of the break up and b*tches who keeps on making rumors about me, and I'm not strong enough that time to fight. I almost didn't graduate because I didn't pay attention to my studies because of the break up, I failed 2 subjects, but they gave me my diploma anyways after I took summer school.. although they didn't let me march during the graduation rights, which made it seem that I didn't graduate at all to others.

I'm in my 1st year in college now and I've moved on, really. I'm a lot better than during my senior year high school. But I'm still super insecure and I still have a really low self-esteem because other people, even from the lower batch, are still b*tching me out! So it seems that I still haven't really gotten back on top.. and I wanna be there again, because my friends are still there..

and also, ever since the break up, I haven't had any suitors or a guy really attracted to me. It's been almost 2 years since the break up. I feel unpretty, but other people tell me that I'm pretty, then why the don't I have any suitors or guys really attracted to me? one, I think because I lost my popularity (I just realized now that even after high school, popularity still counts), two, because I am short (I'm only 4'11) or three, I'm just plain ugly. I know it's not my personality, because it is the last thing you would see in a person, especially on facebook. Well, I get rejected a lot, even on facebook! And having my friends have guys, suitors, boyfriends doesn't help my self-esteem at all!


what should I do? I'm scared of ending up all alone with cats.. lol, but seriously..
It's funny how I was at the top before and now I am almost unknown..

I'm sorry for the very long post!!
I hope you guys can give advice..