HI !!! i'm writing a book and i was hoping to get ur opinion about this small paragraph. pls judge it critically and could u give me some pointers :-)



I saw a sliver glint in his hand then I felt something cold slide into my stomach. And then a numb feeling grew at the spot.
Before I realized what it was, the pain grew from a dull throbbing to a searing burn, I couldn't breathe, my gut felt as though it would burst in flames. On the outside, I was cold but on the inside, I was burning to the core. The feeling was strange and painful. As it sank deeper, the intensity was unbearable. My hands felt the handle of the knife. After deliberating on taking the knife out, I slowly pulled against it. Spasms of pain shot across my body. I couldn't pull it any fur?ther. I felt my shirt soak in warm wetness that began to spread with alarming speed. I could feel the liquid spill out of the gash; hear it dripping on the wood below. The smell of it twisted my stomach.
Through the nausea and dizziness, I saw something that gave me a sudden, final shred of hope. The blood -- spreading crimson across my lime green shirt, pooling rapidly on the floor -- was driving him mad with thirst. No matter his original intentions, he couldn't draw this out much longer.
Let it be quick now, was all I could hope as the flow of blood from my head sucked my consciousness away with it. I took shallow breaths as I stopped fight?ing back the black and white spots that dotted my vision. The dampness spread further around me. I lay my head on the cold floor waiting for death to come.

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IT WOULD BE GREAT IF U COULD ANSWER THIS ONE TOO

For all the people out there with good vocab !!!?
an u describe this in a paragraph?
i need a description of a mask ball for a story. also called masquerade it is set in the "modern times" and i don't really mind how u write it. can be 1rst or 2nd person or just a Plain description.

pls keep the following points in mind :-

* it is held in a HUGE ballroom with decending stairs from the door.
* lots of people enjoying themselves. (around 100-150)
*An ice suplture and a champagne fountain.
*a jazz band playing in the background
*no specific theme but the overall look is regal and elegant.
*it's a bit like a buffet with lots f waiters carrying platters.
*every one wears suits and gowns with masks.

it would be great if u could write a paragraph on it.
pls don't waste ur time on it and try and avoid typing useless comments