The problem with your view is that it leads to arguments, as we're seeing here, on what sorts of conduct constitute 'rape.'
Many years ago, I posted in response to a GQ thread titled
Can I legally refuse to feed Rachel Leigh Cook unless she sleeps with me? that may be of interest to the present discussion.
Either we agree that "rape" refers to a specific crime with specific elements, with the further understanding that "rape under New Jersey law," "rape under Virginia law," and "rape under Israeli law," may not be identical crimes, or we accept this generic idea that rape means whatever the speaker wishes it to mean, which leads us to absurdities like "all married sex is rape," a paraphrase of Andrea Dworkin's articulated position in "Right Wing Women."
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