Ketchup and mustard should remain apart, on different sides of the burger.
To combine ketchup and mustard is folly.

Onions may be placed in proximity to the ketchup. Pickles may be placed in
proximity to the mustard. Yellow mustard is preferable for pickles.

Thousand Island dressing and mayonaisse are poor substitutes for cheese and
should be avoided at all costs.

The milder the cheese the better. You don't want to overpower the burger. It
might get mad at you.


W. Pooh (AKA Winnie P.)