is there anything wrong with this?
i constantly find myself seeking advice from him and i tend to always do as he says.
he is not too controlling but he does act "fatherly" to me as well.

the problem is - i am NOT interested in an "age appropriate" peer to peer relationship. i find guys my age immature, they do not fulfill me. they dont know what they want in life and arent "wise enough". i always find myself getting crushes on my older professors at university. theres this one older prof i am infatuated with - its really just innocent - i am aware enough to not let it become awkward. i find myself wanting to be like him and i always leave his class inspired. i guess that is a good thing. but i wish i was closer to him than that - like id love to have a chat with him etc. but im scared that will make me even more infatuated with him.....

i just want my bf to be a father figure than anything else.
i dont think i want him to treat me as just a girlfriend.
i dont have a desire to be completely independent or self reliant. i want to be taken care of. of course, i am on my way to hopefully having a career of my own as well - but that doesnt make my desires any less real.
i just want to feel comfortable with my own desires. i dont think i can change them!
truth be told i am still just a kid. emotional-wise. at some point in my childhood i think i got "stuck".