Thread: needing help

I'm so conflicted about this SUB! The pamphket said you should be at least 13 hours without opiates, not 24-30....so I took some opiates this morning cuz I could not cope just yet....I thibk I can get through the rest of the day with just the xanax....

Hi

How did the visit go today? I hope you found more encouragement to know that you are going to be that happy, confident self again. Boy, I sure remeraber feeling that I had so lost myself and wondering if I would ever find myself again. Well, I did! In the process, I learned to hone the good parts and work on the parts that needed improving. I learned to let go of all the control I thought I had to have in all things. Life is gonna happen in its own way many times no matter how we try to control a situation. I have learned to let go and be much less hard on myself.

Hey~~ good to see you have started stretching the times between doses. Really good.

Have you and the doctor worked out a plan for you? Share with us when you can.

I am going to sign off early tonight... had a rough day with some tests at the heart doctor's office and am ready to call it a day. Everything went fine, but it is still a pretty emotional thing when they run me through the paces. :-).

Manana
reach

Hi Chris

I am so sorry that you left your doctor's visit feeling short-changed. I sure wish he could have been a bit more helpful! I do think, however, if he thought that the issue was over his head, it was good that he was honest about it.

I see some choices for you here. Another doctor can be tried surely. Just ask straight up if the doctor is able to help you with an addiction issue. Also, more help could be available with a psychiatric doctor. They do deal with addiction. An outpatient rehab could certainly work. Call the drug hotline in the front of the phonebook or a local hospital to ask for references.

I really, really feel compelled to give a gentle nudge here.... don't sell your spouse short. It was my spouse's support that was of the greatest help to me. Even with a taper, there is little chance of hiding withdrawal symptoms. There will be times of edginess, anxiety and general need. In a marriage we help each other along through life. I know you would help him. Expect the same from him to you. It is scary and erabarrassing and undubtedly some crying comes with the territory, but the truth being out in the open is also liberating. It is a common thread among addicts that we stuff emotions down and end up trying to hide ourselves from the world.

Having an addiction, Chris, is serious, but it is not the worse thing in the world at all. It happens. We are all work in progress. Hiding the addiction has not done much good.... let it out in the open to those closest to you. Addiction makes us feel worthless and we forget how much those close to us love us and are willing to work hard alongside us to help. Okay, lecture done.

You remain in my thoughts and prayers.
reach

Hi,
My doc called this afternoon to confirm my Thursday morning appt. To start Sub.....he reminded me that I cannot take any opiates after tonight and I am sooo scared......I'm already thinking up excuses in my head of why I cannot do that....I need some advice.....uugg

Don't be scared...you can get through this. I know this because I did it and you can too. You may be uncomfortable but joy comes in the morning...Thursday morning. Just keep reminding yourself that this is temporary. That's what I did. And look for the silver lining when you are no more a slave to your opiates. As the hours go by just keep reminding yourself where you have been, and where you want to be. You will be in my prayers.

Hi Reach,
Good to see yor worRAB today. I have been thinking, crying, shaming, blaming, hating, myself all day for this mess! Guilt so deep for what I have done to myself and those around me. I
Funny thing is, this doctor did not mention any other option except SUB....I don't know why?? I will take your advise and take the week to really contemplate my decision here.....I don't want to gwt off one substance to then be hooked on another....I am continuing my own "taper" at home.....now at 4.5 hrs between, and. 10 hours between bed and waking up......
Ill post more, as I progress and decide which option is best for me.....
Chris

Thank you! I need all the prayers I can get

Thank u for sharing your story with me.....it gives me so much hope! I am looking forward to Monday and seeing my doctor. I have a question for you and anyone else who may have dealt with this: did u have to take any sort of medicine like suboxone, or methadone long term to help with the recovery process and your success?
Again, thank u to everyone for ur support and advice....I will keep posting with my progress.

Thank u Reach for ur wisdom and understanding. My doc prescribed 10, .05mg xanax for Fridat, Sat, and Sunday. I have really only taken it to sleep, which has been helpful since I usually wake sweating at 4am needing my Vicodin. I am excited for tomorrow......nervous, scared, but mostly ready to LIVE again. I will keep posting. I will update my doc's and my treatment plan tomorrow.

I read ur posts and found it very, very insightful and will probably use it as reference while I am recovering. Unfortunately, I am alone in this as my husband does not know about this. He has questoned some bank withdrawals, but as addicts do, I lied about what the money was spent on....I am not planning on telling him ANY of this.....as I fear he would leave please keep me in ur thoughts as I jump into this new chapter of my life I will be looking forward to the beginning of my recovery....

Made an appt with an addiction specialist doctor......going to meeting at 12.....