The Shitbird

07-12-2010, 11:14 PM

Mods, can you please move this masturbatory, not-half-as-funny-as-the-OP-obviously-thinks-it-is, lame pointless rubbish to the mundane and pointless forum please?

I bet the OP just LOVED writing that, giggling softly to himself at the thought of people on the internet giving him internet hand-jobs over another classic tale of an American mid-life crisis, in three parts.

Shitbird?

. If you really want to shoot something I know a guy needs a kitten put down.

07-13-2010, 01:20 AM

Originally Posted by carnivorousplant

Supposedly putting something on the window, usually a bird silhouette will cause even the meanest bird brain to know it can't fly through.

Wouldn't those be more effective if they were a flattened bird -- you know, like those witch-into-a-wall decorations you see at Halloween?

07-13-2010, 01:56 AM

Originally Posted by Frank

Oh, for Pete's sake, don't bother. You get a hardon for a fucking bird because you can't be bothered to take the minor effort required to keep birds out of your car. Whoop-de-do.

Originally Posted by bucketybuck

Mods, can you please move this masturbatory, not-half-as-funny-as-the-OP-obviously-thinks-it-is, lame pointless rubbish to the mundane and pointless forum please?

I bet the OP just LOVED writing that, giggling softly to himself at the thought of people on the internet giving him internet hand-jobs over another classic tale of an American mid-life crisis, in three parts.

Shitbird?

. If you really want to shoot something I know a guy needs a kitten put down.

I don't know if it's the audience or Scylla, but his stories used to be the toast of the town. How times change.

**Bigt** · 07-13-2010, 05:59 AM

Originally Posted by NineToTheSky

I don't know if it's the audience or Scylla, but his stories used to be the toast of the town. How times change.

It's just that I don't believe they were usually posted in the Pit, where people criticize people in the shittiest way possible for the slightest things. And some people get the mistaken notion that this is behavior that is okay all the time, not just when you are venting.

Plus, it doesn't help that one is a person who generally doesn't like the guy (or at least his posts), and the other is a relative noob who can't even figure out the proper forum to request that the mods to do something. Or just to click a little button.

If anything, those insulting posts make it more likely that the thread would not be moved. And I'd be glad to help just to spite them by calling them both assholes, and probably getting myself called a lot worse.

07-13-2010, 06:07 AM

Originally Posted by bucketybuck

Mods, can you please move this masturbatory, not-half-as-funny-as-the-OP-obviously-thinks-it-is, lame pointless rubbish to the mundane and pointless forum please?

I bet the OP just LOVED writing that, giggling softly to himself at the thought of people on the internet giving him internet hand-jobs over another classic tale of an American mid-life crisis, in three parts.

Shitbird?

. If you really want to shoot something I know a guy needs a kitten put down.

Who shit in your coffee?

07-13-2010, 06:31 AM

Dang! Why all the hatred for Scylla all of a sudden? Did I miss some crucial social falling out on the Dope when I wasn't looking?

I liked it. So what if it wasn't peeing-yourself funny? It was amusing and intriguing. And best of all clean (well okay, not clean clean..

). I love people who don't take themselves so seriously, can laugh at their own foibles, and then turn around share with others how silly they were. It's VERY charming and warm human interest type fun. And so WHAT if it's in the pit? Heaven forbid we not be absolutely foaming at the mouth for every thread posted here!

Hellova lot better than the "let's drop an f-bomb every other word, see if we can come up with the most nauseating, crude, from-the-mind-of-a-pimply-adolescent-teenage-boy insults imaginable" crap that passes for "a thing of beauty" in a lot of rant posts in the pit.

07-13-2010, 08:34 AM

You called?

07-13-2010, 10:33 AM

Originally Posted by BigT

It's just that I don't believe they were usually posted in the Pit, where people criticize people in the shittiest way possible for the slightest things. And some people get the mistaken notion that this is behavior that is okay all the time, not just when you are venting.

Plus, it doesn't help that one is a person who generally doesn't like the guy (or at least his posts), and the other is a relative noob who can't even figure out the proper forum to request that the mods to do something. Or just to click a little button.

If anything, those insulting posts make it more likely that the thread would not be moved. And I'd be glad to help just to spite them by calling them both assholes, and probably getting myself called a lot worse.

I like you. You whine a lot, and the image of an earnest petty little whiney bitch is amusing to me. I picture you sitting ramrod straight at your computer, focusing all of your limited intellect on composing the next in a long line of irrelvant, meaningless little sniffle posts. After all, this is the message board "that has become your life". Got to take it seriously. I do have some questions though.

Why am I a noob when I joined before you?

You think I care if this gets moved? It wasnt a request to the mods, rather an illustration of my opinion of a very boring pit thread?

Why arent you in ATMB? Go! Right now! Petty drama is happening, you need to be there!!!

**Dead Cat** · 07-13-2010, 01:30 PM

I have no personal feelings for Scylla (a fact for which he should probably be glad), but I like what little I have read of him (although I feel that the blimp story, while excellent, has become a tad overrated), and I thought this was a classic. If this post gives him a hard-on, so be it - I was entertained.

**Scylla** · 07-13-2010, 03:36 PM

Originally Posted by CanvasShoes

Dang! Why all the hatred for Scylla all of a sudden? Did I miss some crucial social falling out on the Dope when I wasn't looking?

It's ok. It's worked out really well. The threadshitting has added irony, and texture and depth to my little story that it wouldn't have without it.

The mindless hostility of Frank and bucketybuck perfectly parallels the mindless shitting of the bird on the truck. And, if somebody doesn't get it from that, Mhendo shows up and starts almost literally shitting on my truck. Just like the bird.

The pleasure of the thing is that the threadshitters are just too stupid in their hostility to recognize the irony of their actions and realize that what's really being pitted here is them, and that their contribution is necessary to make it work!

The moral of course, both in the story and metaphorically is that you really only damage yourself by taking the actions of such mindless and insignificant creatures personally.

I could not have done it without them (or without someone else as equally mindless, and hostile, and stupid,) why do you think I insisted it stay in the Pit? They couldn't show up and do their thing if it was in MPSIMS, could they?

I liked it. So what if it wasn't peeing-yourself funny? It was amusing and intriguing.

Thank you very much.

Hellova lot better than the "let's drop an f-bomb every other word, see if we can come up with the most nauseating, crude, from-the-mind-of-a-pimply-adolescent-teenage-boy insults imaginable" crap that passes for "a thing of beauty" in a lot of rant posts in the pit.

Thank you again.