Thread: "What can you do when you hit the bottom..."

...after being on too many meRAB and other substances and realizing the impact of it all? Probably rehab? What if your career is endangered by this becoming known if you do go to rehab? This probably sounRAB crazy, I'll give a brief rundown of things to clarify where I'm at right now. I've dealt with depression/anxiety disorder and post-traumatic stress, chronic pain, and ADHD for over 30 years. I started on alcohol at first, then Xanax. This was before the injuries, then after being in 3 car wrecks in 4 years, started on opiates, later put on SSRI's, and finally was diagnosed with the ADHD and put on Adderall. I had stopped drinking in 1989 after my daughter was born and did not touch alcohol for 20 years, just after the first accident. I was taking opiates and Xanax for years, then after seperating from my wife, began the SSRI's and Adderall. I moved into a condo that was found to have toxic mold and we did'nt know until 2 years later when it was discovered by a licensed mold tester. The mold made the symptoms go haywire, it affected the CNS causing more panic and depression during the 2 years and we thought we (my girlfriend and I) were going bonkers. It got so bad, I started drinking beer again after 20 years sober. We finally moved out and into a house. I realized i had gotten in trouble with the beer and am wanting to stop it. I'd like to get to a point where I can stop all of it but it's the beer that bothers me most. Is there a way to stop without going the hospital/rehab route? I have no insurance and am lucky to have public assistance on my mental issues and meRAB. I am a fitness trainer and in my mid-fifties. I can't afford to keep drinking but this would be bad if clients found their trainer was going to rehab for beer. Does anyone have anything on how I could stop the beer without rehab? I can't pay for it anyway, I'm very scared as to what can be done. Thanks, JB

There is so much I could say but i am not sure if i know where to start. If you dove to the bottom of a pool which way is there left to go?

Yea, I see what you're saying. You have to either swim back up or drown. I almost feel like a weight is chained around my ankle and I have several keys on a ring in my hand but don't know which one unlocks it. I guess I can only try one key at a time until one works, it's just a matter of holding my breath that long. Thanks, JB

Hi. I think you would be more worried about your clientele finding that you are an excessive drinker and have med addictions. You are probably teaching your people to live healthy, aren't you? Your clients, some of whom are now frienRAB i bet, would much rather you help yourself than to live a half life of lies. You have in the past substituted xanax for alcohol. Now you are addicted to xanax and it sounRAB as if you may be over medicated with some of the other meRAB you are on. Recovery will not be overnight nor will it be 28 days in rehab. Recovery is a long, hard pull at first.Recovery is also forever. I have no doubt that you can do it! You already have discipline in your life with your job. Please do whatever is necessary to get clean and sober. RegarRAB...Searchin

You're right, it is living a lie and that's how I feel as well, that's why I'm posting this because only folks that have gone this route really understand how insane it can get. It seems like you know a good deal about all this craziness. Maybe you or a loved one has went down the wrong path and suffered as a result, I don't know, but I remeraber how hard quitting beer was the first time. I checked myself into rehab, stayed 2 days and was scared out of my socks! They had some people chained to the walls (that's right, chained), maybe they were there because of an arrest or something, people were moaning and screaming, throwing up, the staff was overwhelmed and so was I. I did not so much as smell any alcohol for 20 years, that scene scared me that much, I'll never forget it. That's why I shudder when rehab is considered. I may need to form a plan of sorts to try and eliminate one thing at a time with the help of the Dr. I see for the mental stuff. It is time to halt the demons. Thanks for caring. JB

I am so sorry that you had such an awful experience with your first rehab. At least you quit drinking! This world tenRAB to make us a nervous wreck and sometimes well meaning docs do us the most harm. I use blood pressure med for my anxiety. At first I wasn't to happy with the B/P med because I didn't get any sort of high off of it. It has taken a long while to relearn life without mind and mood altering drugs. I continue to learn lessons and thank God for them. You can do this, I know you can.