she says i go off on a crazy mood swing when im drunk. she started crying tonight, and she started saying how she thinks its my dads fault i am the way i am. my dad was a super absuive alcoholic (to me and my mom). i don't think im at all like him, and it really hurt me that she was comparing me to him because i hate him and haven't talked to him in years, she made me feel like i was broken goods you know?.. i have only hit her ONCE, and i immediatly apologized to her after i did it because that wasn't me. shes really got me thinking, and im kinda worried about what she said.

am i in some sort of fucking denial? what do i do?