...Conservative. Thoughts? Yeah, I wore a suit & tie and had a trail of corporate lobbyists (that want tax cuts & deregulation) following me wherever I went on Halloween.

Every time I saw a black person, I accused him of being a Kenyan Socialist Muslim that uses Welfare & Food Stamps. Then anytime someone got upset about it I'd accuse them of pulling the race card, because nothing about that was racist.

My ghoulish super-powers gave me the ability to sap up and destroy every social & domestic program around me, including Social Security, Medicaid, and Unemployment benefits during a recession. I then took those resources and gave it to military contractors to expand our massive Defense budget. The rest I gave to the richest Corporations in the form of more tax cuts.

I also had the ability to spread fear, lies, and hatred at the drop of a dime and have the uneducated masses believe me. It was like magic. No matter how ridiculous. Get this, I told this one guy that Obama spent $200 Million a day in India and was flanked by 34 naval warships. He then went on the internet, and asked on Yahoo Answers about what everyone thought about it. Which led to more uneducated Conservatives believing it.

I went trick-or-treating to lobbyist homes for money, and I gave them tax cuts in return. It's not a handout when the richest 2% get tax cuts from the government - only when a poor person has financial alleviation is it a handout.

But every super-villain has an arch nemesis. My arch nemesis was Healthcare Reform Man. He was evil - he actually believed all Americans should be covered by Healthcare, and believed in the evil Communist beliefs of stopping my friends in Health Insurance, from denying people coverage for having been sick in past. Healthcare Reform Man also was sent to stop the rising costs of Health Insurance costs, and he must be prevented at all costs. As a Conservative, I wanted to ensure that the #1 cause for all personal bankruptcies in America, Health Insurance Costs, still remain #1.
I Speak For All Liberals: Oh, you mean the 5% of all Blacks that consider themselves Republicans? No, they were too hard to find.

Finding a Black Republican is like finding a Conservative that hates war - like a needle in a haystack.